Written by: Chawn Clark
You Could be right!
It is a possibility that your personal experiences and things you were told about relationships and dating has adequately prepared you for healthy dating outcomes. You may feel “I’m not at all confused about anything” as it pertains to dating; moreover, unsolicited advice from anyone about this topic is not required or warranted. Truth is, “You could be right!”
“What if you are wrong?”
What if your attitudes and thoughts about dating have been formed and centered around inaccurate information or your own personal experiences? Truth is, “if you are dating” it is good practice to do an honest life and relationship assessment. Sometimes you need to ask yourself the tough questions that can often be easily ignored or avoided while dating. You should carefully and honestly assess your answer. It may even benefit you to visit or revisit the true definition of a healthy relationship. In fact, if I may, here’s some characteristics of a healthy relationship:
- You can communicate clearly
- You trust each other
- You appreciate each other
- You are able to set healthy boundaries defined only by you
- You both respect and uphold each other’s boundaries
- You are able to respectfully compromise without compromising set boundaries
- You can agree to disagree
- You are able to resolve conflicts in a reasonable and respectful manner
- You are able to maintain your own identity
Well, “Are we there yet?” Perhaps you should take a moment and assess which one/s of these characteristics accurately describe your relationship (if applicable). If you are not in a relationship, take a moment and consider which of these characteristics you would like to have in a relationship.
Okay, “Now what?”
Now, for those of you already in a dating relationship, come in closer, I want to talk to you! Now that you have taken a closer look at where you are relationally, ask yourself these questions concerning you:
- What are my expectations in this relationship?
- Are my expectations being met in this relationship?
- What are the things I like about being in this relationship?
- What are the things I don’t like about being in this relationship?
- What behavior or attitude do I need to change within this relationship?
- Is this the type of relationship that I expected?
- Are my needs being met?
- Is this relationship worth the effort that I am putting into it?
- Do I stay in or leave this relationship?
The Decision is Yours!
Ultimately, your relationships are your choice and your business. But I hope you will invest in your own relational health and well-being. Let’s be honest, “sometimes” the relationships people gravitate towards, form, and hold near and dear to their hearts are based upon unrealistic expectations. It is the misguided information, half-truths and lies” that are most damaging. Whatever you have come to believe about relationships and dating, this may be a good time to reassess things. That’s what the “Go for The Gold” Program, this website, and Instagram are designed to do. We want to provide you with information and encourage you to achieve your relational and life goals. There are so many helpful tools, resources, stories (from youth like you) and lots of fun things to explore on our website and Instagram. Whether you need to explore, reassess, fine-tune or dismiss relationships, our “Go for The Gold” Program, Website and Instagram are here to support and encourage your best possible outcomes!